Children see the world in their own unique way. As adults, we often admire that freedom and creativity, but it can also be frustrating when it clashes with logic or everyday rules. For example, convincing a child to put on a coat in the middle of winter can suddenly feel like the most unreasonable request in the world—cue the tantrum.
Sometimes, the only way to get kids to cooperate is by trying something a little unconventional. That’s why one Redditor asked parents to share the parenting hacks they rely on—tips that may sound absurd at first but end up saving everyone’s sanity. Scroll down to see them all, and who knows, you might find your next go-to trick!
#1
Distraction works. I was at an aquarium and a little kid runs up to a shark display and nails her head on the display plaque thing. She’s about to cry and he mom says “whoopsy! Oh look at that shark! Oh my gosh it’s so close!” The girl goes from almost crying to “huh, where?” Mom is like “right there! Isn’t that amazing that’s a real shark” the kid is mesmerized. I just looked at the lady and said “That was amazing”.
I tried it at home with my own kids later but my wife wouldn’t let me buy a shark.
Image source: ClownfishSoup, Nur Taufik Zamari
#2
Give them false choices, where you are happy with either choice and they both meet your actual goal. It gives them a sense of agency.
“Would you rather brush your teeth first, or change into your jammies first?”
“We have to head home in a few minutes, would you rather start getting your shoes on, or do you want to find them now, and you can carry them while I carry you to the car?”
Etc.
Thought it was ridiculous when I first heard this in a parenting class. With my two kiddos, it worked exceptionally well.
Image source: karimf, cottonbro studio
#3
When my kid was little and we were trying to expand their palate I bought a fun looking notebook, numbered the pages and every 10th one had a star. Then I bought star stickers and this became my kid’s “culinary critic” notebook. Everytime they tried a new food they would either write the name or draw the food and give it between one and four stars. When they filled out a page with a star symbol they got to choose from a menu of special treats (a trip to the bowling alley, baking cookies with Mom and Dad, etc). They almost never refused to try anything once we started the book.
It worked because 1) if they rated something low they knew we wouldn’t ask them to try something too similar 2) it gave them a semblance of control, after all they never had to try anything it just meant they didn’t get to fill out a page in the book 3)I had read a study that kids like fast, tangible rewards shortterm + working towards bigger rewards long term. Getting stickers and to draw/write at that age was a big, fun thing AND being able to physically see how far away from the big reward they were was a huge motivator. .
Image source: Conscious_Writing689, Getty Images
#4
When your toddler falls down (and they aren’t truly hurt) they will often look at you to determine how to feel. If you look concerned and rush to them they will cry. If you smile they will 90% of the time smile, giggle, and start to play again.
Only try this if they look to you to see what to do. If they are bleeding, crying, or for sure injured rush over and take care of them right away. This is only for small falls.
Image source: Past_Ad5967, Getty Images
#5
I pretend my 8 year old is a dog doing tricks and give him treats. I sort of trick him into cleaning up. I’ll say, “sit… stay… paw… good boy!” Then give him a Cheez-it or something then I’ll say, “roll over… go clean your toys!” Then he acts like a dog while he cleans up and I give him another treat after. This sounds insane while I’m typing it but it works really well with him.
Image source: Milk_Factory, Getty Images
#6
I bought my daughter Strawberry Shortcake underwear before she was completely potty trained and told her it was too bad she couldn’t wear them but they were only for big kids who used the potty. Within a few days she was wearing them with no accidents.
Image source: KnittyKitty28, prostooleh
#7
Her: I don’t like broccoli
Me: it was grown in Arendelle
Her: this is actually good.
Image source: pronouncedayayron, EyeEm by Yana Tatevosian
#8
Kid: “I don’t want a ponytail!”
Me: “But it’s picture day. And your hair gets in your face”
Kid: “No!”
Me: “OK…how about a ‘kittycat’?” (knowing she doesn’t know what that means)
Kid: “Yeah, I want what that is.”
Proceeds to do a ponytail. Both happy.
Image source: UnluckyInformation51, Getty Images
#9
If they’re being obstinate, lean into it and make it silly so their mood shifts.
Example: “I don’t want to brush my hair!”
“What do you think would happen if you never brushed your hair? It would get soooo tangled, and then a bird would move in! How many eggs would it lay in your hair?”
“Five million!” And then hopefully giggles.
“Five million eggs?! That’s too many! We’d better brush away that birds nest before you end up covered in bird poop!”
There’s a book, “How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen” that’s full of these little hacks.
Image source: rl4brains, August de Richelieu
#10
Ease transitions with a five minute “wrap up” AND frame the transition as a new beginning instead of an end.
“Hey kids, in five minutes we are leaving the playground so that we can have pizza for lunch,” is way more appealing than “We have to go now! Blah!” because you’re easing into something new and exciting.
Image source: bologna_fans, Barbara Olsen
#11
If they start to get emotional because I’m saying no to something, I remind them I’m their mom.
I say: if I’m the mom, is it my job to… give you all the candy you want?! They laugh because they know where this is going. No, it’s not my job.
Is it my job to…. Let you get cavities and tummy aches?! No!
Is it my job to… help you grow up big and strong? YES.
They might still be disappointed but they are SO much more reasonable if I just… remind them I’m a mom and it’s my job to tell them no a lot. Sounds ridiculous but it works.
Image source: iheartBodegas, Curated Lifestyle
#12
Kids not eating well? Feed them the healthy snacks when you go places. I swear they are always hungry when they leave the house! If you have a cooler with only fruits and veggies, that’s what they’ll eat!
Image source: OlderAndTired, Getty Images
#13
Not a parent, but I’ve heard that putting generic Disney/Spiderman/etc stickers on food containers is pretty effective at tricking young kids into thinking it’s “branded” by that franchise. So you don’t have to pay a mark up on Frozen brand yogurt or whatever.
Image source: Judall, prostooleh
#14
Let kids struggle with puzzles or tasks, productive struggle can build resilience.
Image source: CitrineBlossom, Kelly Sikkema
#15
For babies and toddlers, double-wrap their beds.
Mattress protector -> Sheet -> Mattress protector -> Sheet
So, when they have a Diaper Blowout or Potty Accident or Crummy Tummy Vomit overnight? Instead of having to spend a bunch of time dealing with stripping and remaking the bed at 2am, you just yank off the top layers and… **presto**! It’s all ready for them again.
Means that they’re kept awake for a couple minutes to get their diaper changed (or whatnot) and then back in bed before their brains even register they were awake.
Plus you aren’t trying to get the stupid sheets on while **you** are still half asleep. Just yoink the soaked ones off, toss them in the bathtub or washing machine or wherever, and you and your kid are back to sleep in no time.
Image source: MonkeyChoker80, cottonbro studio
#16
When my kids were little little and wouldn’t eat the food me and my wife cooked, my wife and I would act like we were going to eat it and then ask them to hold it while we did something.
9/10 they’d eat it. They’d love it more if we were like, “hey you ate my food!” and they’d laugh and run away.
Jokes on you. You fell into my trap.
Image source: dudeimjames1234, Alex Green
#17
Instead of saying “inside voice”, “you’re too loud”, or “be quiet”, use numeric levels.
“You’re currently at a level 6, but you really need to be at a 3 or 4 here”.
Then practice asking them what level they are on and what the different levels sound like, where 1 is a whisper, 5 is normal conversation, and 10 is full on yelling.
A child psychologist taught us this and it was a game-changer.
Image source: code-po8, Getty Images
#18
When they make a good grade, don’t tell them they’re smart.
Instead say “You’re such a hard worker, you studied well for this test”.
Image source: TNShadetree, August de Richelieu
#19
My kids respond very well to a timer, they turn it into a game and race to finish first.
Ok kids, I’m setting a 3 minute timer to get your PJs on and brush your teeth. Ready, set, go!
Image source: AndyTheJedi, EyeEm by Kristen Prahl
#20
Read to your child every day at a minimum, preferably multiple times a day until they’re old enough to read and then read to each other out loud. Amazing stuff, highly recommended.
Image source: djheru, Frank Flores
#21
Make screen passwords important phone numbers. Kids will learn them very quickly if it lets them unlock the iPad.
Image source: Negative0, Frank Flores
#22
Whenever mine bumps his elbow, stubs a toe, etc. I’ll ask if he wants me to put a spare one on. When he says yes, I tell him to close his eyes, I gently squeeze his arm, leg, or whatever part I’m “replacing”, make a click noise, and gently squeeze and make another click noise when I put the “new one” on. 9/10 times, it immediately feels better. .
Image source: Ghost17088, Kateryna Hliznitsova
#23
Give your kids a safe outlet. Kids are a lot less likely to do bad. like for example draw on all the walls if they have a wall space to draw on (either chalkboard paint or even a large newprint sized paper pad on the wall) kid keeps getting into junk food? Fruit salad made with yogurt with a small dash of sprinkles on top. You gotta be two steps ahead and realize they’re not doing these things to be naughty, just lesrning how to navigate the world.
Also I can’t stress enough, time out means NOTHING if all you do is sit them there. My rule was a few minutes, and they had to spend time *thinking about why they were there and what they could have done differently.* then we’d talk about it. .
Image source: garbagegoat, Keira Burton
#24
Respecting them, trying to understand them and listening to them with full attention when they talk about something with passion. It means so much to them. Whenever I am at family/friends gatherings, their kids will always end up flocking around me and will share things and I genuinely give them my attention and just quietly listen. Many times I learn a lot. Their parents are often shocked that their child never shares anything with them but sat and spoke to me for an hour.
My child often shares everything that happened at school, albeit at random times with either me or his dad. Sometimes he will ask me to turn my “friend mode” on where I don’t get to judge or have a mom reaction. Other parents have told me that they have no clue because their child never shares. Parents sitting down at a child’s level and playing or just listening to them is all that a child wants. It is also a lot of fun.
Image source: Background-Teach390, Ketut Subiyanto
#25
Transitions to other activities are by far easier by giving them 5 to 10 minute heads up. If you need to go somewhere tell them how much time until that point. Then give 5 to 10 minute warning before the next activity.
Image source: Professionalsarcasm3, Jep Gambardella
#26
When my daughter started getting more picky about food, I’d change how I served meals. For an entire month she ate lunch from a floating plastic tray in the bathtub. A little while later, it was cut up cheese and fruit mixed in a bowl full of ice cubes that she had to pick through to get the food. Another time she ate all her meals out of a muffin pan. I bought a giant one at a thrift store with like 24 muffin holes and I’d put one or two bites of food in each. It was like it poked at her primal brain to get a snack out of each muffin hole, even if it was something she would have refused off a plate. .
Image source: dontforgetyour, inkakot
#27
If they’re under 4-5 buy them two of their favourite teddybear and put one away in case they lose one and throw a fit.
Image source: DaftPump, Getty Images
#28
This is for newborns but using the 5 S’s (Swaying, swaddling, Shushing, sucking and side) help calm a fussy baby. Even to this day, if my youngest (now 6) starts to lose control, I rock her in my lap and say “shush shush shush”. I’m sure now it’s a conditioned response but who cares??
Also deep breathing in moments of big feelings. 1) it actually does help the kid. 2) it helps you as the parent. when you demonstrate you are also focus your energy and slowing your reaction to their big feelings.
DO NOT MATCH THEIR ENERGY!!! This one took me a long long time figure out. I mean I knew it but to actually go to a 0 when your kid is at 100 is hard!!
When you do match your kid’s energy – own it, after everyone has cooled off. “That was really hard huh? I had some big feelings too. How did you feel when mom was mad? Oh I’m so sorry I got mad. You know what – that’s kinda how I feel when you are yelling at me too”.
Image source: domjoneli, Kristina Paukshtite
#29
If they have a favorite tv show and/or characters and are a picky eater print out stickers of their fave characters and put the stickers on alllll pre packaged foods. An oat bar is boring and yucky but a BLUEY oat bar??? And if you keep it consistent and remember which character stickers goes for which snack your kid will be able to tell you what they want for a snack even if they aren’t talking a whole lot yet!
For example, my kiddo loves Sesame Street so he has healthy oat bars that have a purple package so they get count stickers. Now my child knows to ask for a “count bar” and I make sure that every time I buy those bars they get count stickers. Same with all the other characters, each character is assigned their own snack. .
Image source: Lazy_Fuel8077, zhenzhong liu
#30
Here’s a couple that worked for us when our now-11 year old was 18mos-3 years or so, toddler to preschool aged.
The toys live at the store. We go visit them. We can hold them/hug them and wave and say hi and blow kisses…. But they live at the store. When our kiddo got toys, they were gifts she got at home, and that meant the toy chose to come live with us. If we went to the THRIFT store, we could adopt a toy. We have never, in 11 years, had a tantrum about toys at the store.
Pick a letter and a color every week. For that week point out that letter and that color when you see it out in the wild. Your preschool kid will pick it up after a day if not sooner. Bonus points if the letter is also in the color of the week.
At the grocery store, out for a walk, wherever you are, point out words. Signposts, brand names, car makes, the garage sale signs. Even if they’re long words (“poultry, bakery, garden) show them the first letter, or ask them to identify any letter they recognize in a word. Sound the whole word out and make sure you emphasize the letters they recognized.
Let them experience textures. If their hands aren’t filthy haha, let them hold the football at Walmart. Let them hold the lettuce you’re buying. Let them hug poles and grab bushes and put their faces in coats and grass and the dog’s neck when they hug it.
Keep healthy choices for food easily reachable. We bought a 3-tier cart and put fruit and age-appropriate healthy snacks and drinks on it. There were toddler plates, spoons, forks, knives and cups on it. Kiddo never had to ask to have a healthy snack when she wanted to. The pantry with the closed door was for “sometimes” snacks. Cookies, tortilla chips, red vines, etc. Those she had to ask for, and we didn’t restrict them too much so we could reward her asking first. To this day she’ll still ask first if she can have treats.
To clarify so no one thinks I’m bragging, she still has preteen meltdowns. But not over snacks, and she’s a good reader, so the above advice did work 😂.
Image source: AmaranthWrath, Yunus Tuğ
#31
Water is the great reset.
Kids being insane? Water. Plastic bowls and cups in the bath. Set up a monster truck car wash in the sink. Have them “water” the plants which ends up with them playing with the hose. Add a popsicle and its like they just zen out.
Image source: notenoughbooks
#32
When a little kid is having a meltdown cos they “Want to do it by themselves” when they’re not capable yet…
I’d respond “Sure, you can do it. Here, let me help you do it by yourself”
Worked 99% of the time.
Another one for very wriggly kids when you’re trying to get them dressed….
Put their diaper/pullup on first, but leave it around their knees. It hobbles them so they can’t escape. Makes it easy to dress the rest of them.
Image source: Gypsyfella
#33
To actually like your kids, not just love them. Take a real interest in their lives. Sound appreciative when they talk to you or approach you early on. It can get extremely hard early on in their lives because in their formative years they can talk a lot and sound incoherent at times, and as a parent, you can become impatient or lose interest, especially after a long day of work. In general, more listening and less constant advice and judgment. It can become counterintuitive at times because you feel like most of their early life problems have simple solutions. When they want your actual opinion, always state that it might be something you’d do in that situation versus this is what you ‘should do’.
Image source: johnjohn2214
#34
OK, this is f****d up, but funny, and it worked.
When they were little, I told my kids that if they lied, a dot showed up on their forehead that only grown-ups could see.
To be fair, when kids were tiny, it was pretty easy to tell when they aren’t telling the truth, so we got credibility early on.
As they got older, when my kids started spewing BS, they’d hold their hand over their forehead.
It worked WAY longer than I thought. Mostly because the older kids would use it against the younger ones.
Yes, when they got older, they figured it out.
I am paying for therapy.
Image source: JustSomeGuyInOregon
#35
I’ve noticed that most of the answers seem to be for *small* children, so I’ll add one that’s more valuable for older kids and teens:
*Explain* your rules, and allow them to be challenged.
A *lot* of kids and teens are better at following rules if they understand why they exist, and that goes double for neurodivergent kids. Allowing them to be challenged means opening a conversation; if they disagree with the rule, give them the chance to change your mind or find a fairer compromise.
That approach doesn’t work for every kid, and not for every rule, but there’s a good number of kids that rebel mainly against rules that feel unfair or arbitrary to them. The fairer and more thought-out they see your rules as being, the more likely they are to accept rules they *don’t* understand as well, because if you’re generally fair and reasonable there’s probably a good reason even if they don’t get it.
Image source: RikuAotsuki
#36
When i used to be scared of monsters and didnt want to sleep growing up my mom once told me that if monsters came they would have my parents as diner, then my brother as dessert and when they would come to my room they wouldnt be hungry anymore. Surprisingly it worked. Slept like a baby knowing that my whole family would be eaten alive but at least i was safe.
Image source: zhayona
#37
When my kids we’re growing up and I’d tell them to do something. If they responded with “why!?”. I’d stop and say,”hop on one foot.”. They would do so and then I’d ask “why are you doing that?”.”Because you said to.”. “Exactly, now go do what I asked you please.”.
Image source: Qwawn72
#38
Literally repeat back what they say to them.
A lot of people feel like they don’t know how to talk to kids. A lot of people don’t know how to talk to kids.
It feels awkward at first, but ou literally just repeat back what they say.
Example:
Kid – I have a dog!
Me – you have a dog.
Kid – his name is wolf and he licks my sister.
Me – you have a dog named wolf and he licks your sister.
It’s not meant to be annoying or condescending. It literally just lets a kid know you are engaged and listening b.
Image source: rothmaniac
#39
Crime makes food taste better. I sure hope no one is going to STEAL MY VEGETABLES AND EAT THEM ALL!!!! Ten seconds later my kids have “stolen” all my vegetables and gleefully eaten their ill gotten gains. They think they’re being so sneaky eating tomatoes and carrots lol.
Image source: verymanysquirrels
#40
Counting….loudly…..1…….2!….I never got to 3 because they’d scramble to their rooms. It was a good thing because I had no idea what happened after 3….yet it worked every time!?
Image source: Practical-Concept-35
#41
Pretending that our streaming services are cable TV. You want to watch Moana? It’s not on until Friday. Elsa isn’t back on our TV until after your nap!
We also will often say that *character in tv show or movie* is sleeping, so we can’t turn the tv on because it will wake them up, and it’s not nice to wake someone up!
We do limited screen time and it’s only on the TV, so it’s a very efficient way to set time limits and get around tantrums!
Image source: FriedPickle0662
#42
Gently but firmly rubbing your thumb between your babies eyebrow soothes them when they are crying.
Image source: Silver_Mousse9498
#43
Use scissors to cut their food up into smaller pieces. So much faster. .
Image source: Dickiedoolittle
#44
For my boys when little until about four, I made pink chicken. Well the package said Salmon but whatever.
At about 4 and half I remade it and called it salmon and they thought it was great.
About 10/12 the oldest was off all fish so….we had a good run.
Image source: 57_Eucalyptusbreath
#45
Give kids a choice where you can.
Your kids don’t like veggie medley? Consider an alternative that you can accept. Let them choose. If children feel empowered with a choice they will exercise it.
And you win either way!
Image source: Wrong_Transition4786
#46
Telling the kids that you can tell when they are asleep because they snore. After that sinks in, when they fake sleeping they snore.
Image source: DotAccomplished5484
#47
The thing that worked for me that I passed on to other moms was to separate a kid who is in time out from everyone else. A kid who is pissed and screaming in the same room as you is only going to increase the negative energy. You get mad and the anger eggs them on. Put them in their room. Let them feel their feelings in a safe place and check back in after a suitable amount of time has passed. I always told my kid to come get me when he’s ready to talk. He usually took about 10 minutes to himself and came to talk to me about whatever and we went on with our day. Remove the stress and everyone is better for it. No problems can be solved when everyone is mad. I did this at a friend’s house with her kid one day and it changed everything about the way she parented. She said it was like heaven opened for her.
Image source: Slow-Engine-8092
#48
At 8 pm, every single night, drop everything your currently doing, put your baby in the bath and go through the bedtime routine with them.
As they grow they will be accustomed to doing the bedtime routine at 8ish, including when they start taking care of themselves, and you will have 1-2 hours to yourself.
Image source: Camellightsinabox
#49
Oh you want this toy really bad “ let’s take a photo for Santa” 90% success rate.
Image source: SoundCA
#50
Don’t go back on your word as a parent. That includes things like time out and the word “no”. Don’t teach your kid that whining and moaning will let them out a minute early. Don’t teach them that crying will get them the toy they want at the store. Don’t let “sorry” replace a two minute break from playtime if they’ve already been warned that their behavior is unsafe/unacceptable. 95% of those “what is wrong with gen alpha” videos are a mixture of that and iPads. It’s not the kids fault that they act this way (assuming they are still very young) but the kids are the ones to suffer emotionally and (later) socially because they have no emotional regulation or impulse control and no other kids or adults want to be around them.
Image source: QueenOfDemLizardFolk
#51
If the store is out of dinosaur nuggets, just tell your kids that you bought dinosaur egg nuggets.
Image source: SirFelsenAxt
#52
For teenagers, don’t feel like you need to answer every request as a yes or no. It’s ok to say, we will need to talk about that some more, let’s see about tomorrow. It’s remarkable how many issues just take care of themselves if you stall.
Image source: Waagawaaga
#53
Remember they are small humans and have the same rights as any other Human. This should feed into every way you treat them.
From an early age always knock on their door before you enter their bedroom. Their bedroom is the one place in the world which is theirs. Never send them to their bedroom as punishment. Give them as much privacy as you can.
If you threaten a consequence then you MUST follow through so they know you mean what you say. Make sure you and your partner are consistant and back each other up – if you disagree then argue in private.
As they grow up treat them like a small adult.
Image source: TeaBaggingGoose
#54
When my kids were little and I took them for walks, we would play “red light green light”. Red light meant stop, green light was go and yellow light was “come back to mommy”. It was a fun and controlled way for them to play with less worry for me.
Image source: hilhilbean
#55
I blamed the clock. I’d say, see? Point at clock. The clock says it’s 7:30. The clock says it’s time for bed.
I let them pick out their clothes since preschool but I only left seasonably appropriate shoes and clothes in the closet.
Image source: Olderbutnotdead619
#56
If you want them to do an activity, start doing it first. Most kids will want to do what you’re doing if they simply see you doing it first.
Image source: TheRealOcsiban
#57
Karate or some form of martial arts if they have pent up aggression/energy and have hit you or others.
Image source: soundofconfusion
#58
Put your baby to bed early, then give them a dream feed (feed while they are asleep, works best for bottle feeders) they’ll take the entire bottle without waking. Will give you a longer stretch of sleep.
Image source: Mama2PL
#59
When a child gets emotional/upset, agree with them!
3yo: “I don’t wanna leave the park” Me: “I know, you were having so much fun, it’s the worst to have to leave now” 3yo: “we’ll come back tomorrow?” Me: “yep!”
It works every time and my daughter handles transitions, relinquishing toys, changing behavior so well!!
I stick to my guns of empathy if the whining goes a bit longer. But look them in the eyes and agree it sucks, but it’s gotta be done!
Image source: No-Bid6661
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