When Christmas Toys Experience a 124 MPH Crash Test

What happens when Christmas toys experience a head on collision at 124 mph? What in the world do you think would happen? They atomize in an instant as you can watch them fold into the barrier in slow motion. One moment you have a fully-functioning toy and the next you have a cloud of dust and shattered parts that used to be something fun to play with. High speeds and toys don’t mix, or rather high speeds and toys, coupled with a solid barrier just waiting for some hapless toy to run into it while going in excess of a hundred miles an hour, don’t mix. If you really want to terrorize your kid show them this video and tell them that if they misbehave this is what Santa’s elves will do to their toys.

That should get at least a few kids to appreciate what they get and not complain.

Some kids might actually think this is pretty cool and start lining up their toys and those of other kids to see just how big of an explosion they can create when said toys ram into the wall. A few might even go so far as to put the old metal toys on the track and see what happens there. Obviously the dust cloud wouldn’t be as big but there’s a good chance you might be looking at a colorful sheet of metal with a couple of bent axles sticking out of it at the end. Of all the ideas to do with toys this one seems like the most vindictive to ever be thought up. But obviously someone had fun with it since they did it again, and again, and again.

Poor Santa, he never had a chance when his Harley smacked into the wall doing over a hundred. And Barbie, huh boy, her upper body was at least intact, but she wouldn’t be walking anytime soon after this since I think her legs were either served up as collateral damage or were so bent and twisted that she’d still be an amputee at the end of the day. And the LEGO car, did anyone expect any different? The thing exploded as though it was made of fairy dust and glitter, sending only a few intact blocks flying away like shrapnel.

The rescue chopper pretty much disintegrated on impact, leaving nothing but a pile of red plastic. Just when you think that kids are the most damaging force when it comes to toys someone has to raise the bar and show you that it can get so much worse. The thing about this is that I’m sure there are people that would take bets to see which wreck was the most severe and which one produced the biggest debris cloud. You know it would happen if someone mentioned it.

So unless you really want to traumatize your kids, and I know a few of you out there might think about it at least, keep in mind that this is being done in a safe environment and with skilled professionals at the helm. DO NOT try this at your home, for your kids’ sake and the sake of your home.

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