As we come to the final season of Lost, I look back upon what has happened and feel a mixture of sadness and nostalgia. I fondly remember sitting on the couch and experiencing those first moments of the plane falling, the excitement as a few folks got off the island, and the utter confusion of time travel. Now, as I approach the end, I ruminate upon things that I would like to see in this final season but, more than likely, won’t.
1. Zombies: Lost needs some zombies. They did time travel; why not throw the undead in there? I’m pretty sure John Locke would go down in the big book of badass monster killers right alongside Ash from Army of Darkness and Kurt Russell in any John Carpenter flick.
2. Giant Monsters: This is a mysterious, tropical island, for the love of God. Where the hell are the giant monsters? And don’t start on the smoke thing, that doesn’t count. I want some flesh and blood monster to stomp through the forest and wreak bloody havoc upon the survivors. What would be better for an ending than a triumphant dance on top of a giant monster?
3. A sword fight: C’mon. Can a brother get a sword fight? There was a pirate ship, there has to be some swords lying around on this island. To hell with the guns. Grab some swords, get to the top of a waterfall and just hack and slash. I don’t care who’s in the fight either. Hell, Hurley could buckle some swash for all I care. Just give us two swords, the rest will happen naturally.
4. John Locke in a giant throne a la the end of Conan: After being triumphant over zombies, a giant monster, or the victor of a badass swordfight, John Locke will climb to the top of some old Mayan-looking temple that happens to have a beautiful carved throne. Then our hero sits in his chair and surveys the surroundings and brings some sexy half-clad Others to rub his glistening bald head. And…scene!
5. More zombies: If what I want happens, then there are zombies. But you need more zombies. A few zombies isn’t much of a fight. You can’t feel a sense of accomplishment unless you push back a horde of zombies. More zombies, thank you.
6. Everyone Dead: That would be an epic ending. All survivors must die. Perhaps the island accidentally gets nuked during a bombing test or the zombies overrun everything. Kill them all. The camera soars up through the trees and looks down upon the bodies of all our favorite characters. Maybe the Hand of God will smack them all down, who cares? Don’t let Lost go out like The Sopranos with Journey blazing and Jack eating a sandwich with Kate and little Aaron. Kill them all.
7. One of Kate’s boobs: ‘˜nuff said.
7.5 Okay, both of Kate’s boobs.
All of these things together would make for the most epic final season of any TV show ever made. They can’t do that though because all television from that point forward would be downhill. It couldn’t be topped. So, if God is smiling down upon me. One of these things will happen (or perhaps one and a half depending on which one it is.) I know none of this will happen, but if it does, I reserve the right to say ‘Cool’.
Kree Atore
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I would love to see a giant monster and a sword fight. The rest of the ideas are too outlandish or too much (Kate's boobs) for network television.
Really? I mean, really?
too much for network or not, it doesn't change the fact that I do indeed wanna see Kate's boobs.
That was the stupidest, most inane LOST post ever. Pointless and not even funny. Juvenile at best.
#4, John Locke on a throne- that is how I will always remember him from now on.#7.5, All tv is already downhill from here. They may as well flash us that boob, then pack up and shut the whole thing down once Lost s done.
Insanely unfunny.0/5
I'm a little late to the party, but did you want them to bring Locke back to life to fulfill your fantasies?